I’m fairly stressed. With one week down I thought I would be more relaxed about being here. Ironically I’m feeling pressure already and exams won’t begin for a few weeks. It’s not that my classes are too difficult; it’s that I don’t completely understand the wave of information that has been thrown at me. I want that trend to not continue because it doesn’t bode well for the future.
In high school I honestly thought I was one of the smartest people at my school. I wasn’t really challenged and that probably hurt me more than I could have realized then. All four years of undergrad college I had it in my head that I was somewhere just above the middle. When I tried I did well, and when I didn’t the outcome was never good. Now, I really believe that it was a miracle I was accepted. Currently I’m lacking self confidence, and that is extremely frustrating for me, a quasi perfectionist.
Never in my life have I felt this way, and I keep telling myself that I should work hard and everything will sort itself out. I am getting overwhelmed… and for no logical reason. I want to remain positive and once I start getting work done I’m sure I’ll begin to make strides towards my goal.